Xuen Tey Week 1: Define Yourself in One Word
Identity is a topic that I have always found strange. How is anyone supposed to summarize a whole person—their thoughts, their feelings, their beliefs—when there is so much to cover? When someone asks me to ‘think about my identity’ I never know what they want me to do. Do they want me to talk about where I was born? Am I supposed to talk about where I grew up? Because I was born in one place and grew up in another. Confusing, I know. Or are they asking about my hobbies or interests? Do they want to know what I consider important or what I think others consider important?
When I’m asked about identity, there’s this one question that I always connect to this topic—the question ‘If you had to sum yourself up in [amount] of words, what would you say?’. I personally despise this question. It’s not that this question is offensive, or rude, or harmful to me. It’s just that I never know how to respond. To me, when people ask me that question, they’re asking me to sum up who I am, to condense my entire life into just a few words, and I cannot fathom how I’m supposed to do that. People, in my view, are far too much to be so easy to summarize, so answering that question never ends well. No person I’ve ever met is just ‘creative’ or just ‘normal’ or ‘boring’ or ‘weird’. They are complex people with so much to them and trying to condense them into just one word feels disrespectful because people are never just one thing and will never be.
The only word I’ve ever been able to describe people on its own is their name. That may seem kind of strange or contradictory because their name is not necessarily unique. Every person probably has a person who shares their same name out there. Some people know those who share their name, some people don’t, but the fact doesn’t change. However, the reason the name is able to sumarize them in their entirety isn’t because the word is particularly special or unique. To me, it’s simply because they are them. They are whoever they are, made up of what they like and don’t like, what they do and what they believe, and the easiest, simplest way of expressing that is by calling them by the name they call themselves and that they choose to use. People’s identities are still complex adn wonderful things that are impossible to describe in one word, but if I had to describe them, the best way in my view would be to use the name they choose to have others remember them by.
Wow Xuen, not only did I thoroughly enjoy this read, but I relate deeply. I agree that humans, as individuals, are far too complex to be able to summarize. I specifically loved the repetition used in your second sentence (Why is my brain doing RA!?). I found your paragraph about names rather interesting, partially due to the fact I have never heard this take before, and partially due that I'm not sure I fully grasped it. I think names are part of one's identity but I know many don't actually like or prefer their name, so I feel it wouldn't be fair to say the best way to describe one is with their name. Overall though, I loved and I mean loved your share, and am looking forward to your next one.
ReplyDeleteHi Xuen, I agree with you one hundred percent that people are so much more than just a few words. I also love your take on using your name as the word to describe yourself as. I have never thought of my name as something that holds that much weight, but the way you explained it made me appreciate my name so much more. From now on I think I will use my name as my answer because its true, one word to describe Jaycee is Jaycee. I can't wait to see what you write next!
ReplyDeleteAs someone who has always thought very categorically about their own identity, this really put into perspective why it’s important to have conversations about it, when there is the chance and time to do so of course. I’ve heard of similar conversations about one’s name before, but hearing your take was interesting! I feel like it must depend though, because even if someone identifies with/likes the name they are given (or even if they choose their name), other people might get a different idea from the connotation and surface level impression of their name. But I do agree that someone’s name can potentially be used to describe, at least, most of a person.
ReplyDeleteXuen, this experience with describing “identity” is just so relatable. I totally agree with the notion of summing yourself up in just one or two words being something incredibly difficult to even imagine. I like the way you tie the complexities of a person to their name, it’s a very thoughtful thing to consider of a person’s identity. They’ve been called a name, their name, for much of their life—making up a large part of the “Who?” that comes with a person. I find this blunt (in a good way!) approach to the topic of individual identities a refreshing opinion in a sea of people trying to label themselves, trying to pin their lives to different aesthetics or methods of living—all to forget about the endless details and time that makes a person who they are. Thanks for this insight on the idea of identity!
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